my son Jerry is not exactly a fashion plate.* Jerry's fashion choices, since the age of 3, have chiefly revolved around minimizing the numbers of buttons, snaps, or zippers involved. Ideally, his outfit would have none. So a typical day for Jerry is a teeshirt or long sleeve tee shirt and sweat pants or athletic pants. Pity the fool who trys to get him to wear a polo shirt or jeans. Don't get me started on suits or even button down shirts.**
This has been infuriating occasionally frustrating as a parent, but I have long since given up trying to make him dress differently.***
However, a conversation I had with Jerry the other day completely altered my perception on how I felt about these clothes, in particular the sweatpants.
We were having a talk about drugs, alcohol, and peer pressure, because believe it or not, these are things that 7th graders need to be equipped to talk about and deal with. Oy. I had heard of some kids his age who had recently found themselves in a stressful situation where they felt pressured into going along with something they didn't want to and figured the time was right to talk to Jerry about it. So, after we discussed some nuts and bolts of drug and alcohol abuse, we began to talk about peer pressure, and how I could help him if he needed ways to say "no". The rest of our conversation I will write as dialogue.
Jerry: "Mom, I don't really care what people think of me. I'm not really a follower."
Mom: (thinking he's sweet, but not completely convinced): "I know, but its still good to talk through these situations".
Jerry:(Persisting): "Mom, look at these sweatpants."
Mom: (Surprised): "What?"
Jerry: "Do you think if I cared what people thought of me I would wear pants like these every day?"
Mom: (beginning to get it, stifles a laugh)
Jerry: "People are always telling me not to wear sweatpants, and to put something nicer on. But I'm still wearing these. I really don't care what they say."
Mom: (thinks to herself, "Bless you child" and "Where can I get you more of those sweatpants?")" I guess you have a pretty good point there."
As far as I'm concerned, he can wear the sweatpants to his wedding.
AZ
*See Violet en Vogue for a study in contrast.
**Yes, there have been tears....(on both of our parts)...when he is asked to don a shirt with more than one button.
***If we consider long the past few months.
I love this.
The other day I told Ike he was playing too many video games. "Mom," he said, "I'm a teenager. I could be doing drugs."
Carry on, sir.
Posted by: Jenny Katz | February 22, 2012 at 10:09 AM
Love it, Jenny!
Its good to have each other to talk through as we navigate these tween/teen waters together!!
Ps thanks for commenting...
Amy
Posted by: Amy Zimmerman | February 22, 2012 at 10:16 AM