ZimWex Family Blog

A note from Violet's Teacher.

Below, a quick note I received from Violet's teacher this weekend...It starts rather normally, then takes a turn for the slightly bizarre...

Hi Amy,

I hope all is well in London!

I just wanted to send you a quick email about a couple of things.  Yesterday during rest Violet bumped her head on the shelf as she was putting her rest mat away.  There wasn't a bump, but we put some ice on it and today there is a slight bruise there.  Just wanted to let you know.  And I mentioned it at dismissal.

Also, she made a fortune teller in paperwork today and for one of the "fortunes" she wanted me to write, "you will die."  I explained that this could be upsetting or scary for someone, and she said "I know, I'm not going to use it at school, just at home."  I just didn't want you to be surprised when you saw it!  Normally this is something we'd just mention at dismissal, but since you were out of town I thought I'd email.  

Violet's been doing great, by the way.  She mentioned she missed you, but she's been happy and busy.

See you Monday,
Beth

On justice.

As you may know, there are some people in my house who are, to put it mildly, quite concerned with things being fair.*

Here's the latest on fairness from Miss Violet, word for word:

"It's not fair! Dolls get to turn their heads all they way around behind them and we can't!"

This has become a pervasive injustice, of which she is newly reminded every single time she picks up her American Girl doll.

Life's a bitch.

AZ

 

 

*This is surely in no way connected from one of their mother's mild obsession with said same subject. 

Answers

1. What is apartheid?

A political system where black people were completely separated from white people.

2. What is non-violent resistance?

Where you protest something without using weapons. ("Kind of like Martin Luther King?" "Just like Martin Luther King")

3. What is a nuclear bomb? Was it good or bad that we dropped it?

A bomb that kills lots of people at once, ("plus there is nuclear fallout", adds Jerry).  Right, plus there is nuclear fallout, which means people are sick for a long time afterwards.  It was not really all that good, but it basically ended the war so I think most people in America were pretty happy about it.

4. What is Communism? What is Capitalism?

LOOOOONNNNGGGGG explanation.

5. How did we win the cold war?

AGAIN LOOONNNGG, and happily interrupted by arriving at our tube stop.

6. Where was I before I was born?

Um...

7. Is the Dalai Lama a King?

Kind of.

8. Do women in china wear pants?

 Yes.

9. Why was Saddam Hussein hiding in a hole?

So we wouldn't find him.

10. How do we know Hitler is dead?

He would be really really old by now if he was alive.  

11. Who is the leader of the Taliban?

Um, I'm not sure.

12. How did Nelson Mandela end apartheid?

By leading a resistance. And going to Jail for a super long time.

13. Can I have some ice cream?

Yes, if we can have a break from questions.

14. Why do they sing "London Bridge is falling down?" when London Bridge is not falling down?

Lets check the iphone and find out.  Hmmm, nobody seems to know, but it was the oldest bridge in London (built in the 1000s), so eventually it was probably in pretty bad shape.

15. How long did they leave the heads on the London Bridge before taking them down?

Um, I don't know but they are not there now.

16. Do they still cut off people's heads today?

Not in London.

17. What did Jack the Ripper do?

 He killed a lot of people.  ("Kind of like Hitler?"} Well, yes except he wasn't in charge of a country.

18. Can we take a taxi?

No, no, no, yes.

19. What is colonization?

When big countries like England, Spain, the Netherlands, took over other lands for themselves.  They said they were helping the people there by bringing them medicine, books, science, etc. but the people there weren't always so happy about it.

20.  Who was Madame Tussaud?

 A French lady who learned how to make wax heads while in prison during the French Revolution and going through the severed heads to copy the war criminals and prove her allegiance to the Resistance.

21. How did Princess Diana die?

. In a really really bad car crash

22. What does the Queen do?

Um, she is in charge of things like balls.  ("Balls?" a giggle from Jerry)

AZ

Just three.

This is who is living at my house right now.

It is quiet.

And calm (ish).

And fun.

And unsettling.

More thoughts on this as the week progresses!

AZ

 

On my mind today.

.....what exactly is it that makes it so much harder for the loves-of-our-lives to place their dirty dishes into an empty dishwasher then into an empty sink?

AZ

Chesbians?

At bedtime tonight, Ella was searching for a word that meant "the children of lesbians".*

We came up with chesbians, chays, cogs (children of the gays), and cols.

Any other ideas out there?

AZ

*This after both she and Ruby had trouble digesting how Ellen (DeGeneres)** could have a girlfriend.  We were like "uh...guys...um who do you live with?"

**yes we are watching American Idol  again, and boy is it time consuming!

A theatrical first.

Last night T and I were lucky enough to have tickets to Wishful Drinking, the new Carrie Fisher one-woman show playing on Broadway.*  We were very excited and even more excited to see as we sat down that the row in front of us was the house seat row...saved for Tony voters, and celebrities.  There was Marlo Thomas and Phil Donahue!  And there was Wally Shawn!

And then, the folks in front of us sat down.

Now many of you have had the unfortunate luck of sitting behind someone much taller than yourself.  Who hasn't?  But how many of you have had to sit behind this????

No joke. This was my view of Carrie Fisher.  The hair (one foot tall, according to its owner) was a major part of my theatrical experience last night.

Tanya, who is unfailingly good with celebrity spottings, was the first to notice that this wasn't just any hair, this was celebrity hair.  Whose? Bello the Clown  , seen here with full makeup.  Yes, this famous daredevil clown was there to yuk it up at Carrie Fisher.

He couldn't have been nicer about it.  Checking in with me to see if I was okay ( I was not okay), slumping, and leaning to the right throughout the show while I leaned to the left.  Nonetheless, the temptation to take my contraband beverage and dump it right on top of the hair and help it deflate just a teensy tiny bit was strong.

Carrie Fisher, blessedly, was funny enough and compelling enough, that the hair was a mere anecdote in my evening.  Had she been anything less it would have been intolerable!

Shouldn't he have to sit in the back row?

AZ

*if you can still get tickets, you should absolutely do so.

The kind of thing its hard to understand.

This perpetual line outside of the Marc Jacobs STUFF store.

 

Like the line outside of Magnolia and the wait for Piccolo Angolo, this seems to me a singular waste of time.

That said, I will surely end up in this line in a few weeks when I panic about not having begun any of my Christmas shopping and realize that this place is one of the few places on Bleecker Street that is affordable and close by.

But I am not yet sure if I will admit to that here on this blog. 

AZ
 

 

A discovery.

Violet: (After finishing on the potty) Ima?

Tanya: Yes?

Violet: I have a hole in my butt!

Tanya: That's right, honey.

Violet: Where did it come from?

Tanya: We all have holes in our butts.

Violet:  But I don't want to have a hole in my butt!

Tanya:  baffled silence followed by hysterical laughter.

Overchoice.

Because before there just weren't enough varieties of Wheat Thins for me.

AZ